“He will give in. I know I am one of his prime ’employees’, he would relent eventually. He did take time in Mallika’s case too,” she replied candidly.
Again Ramya’s life looked to be a case of some intense mystery. The mention of Mallika’s name in that setup took her by surprise.
“Mallika? Who was she?” Ramya feigned ignorance to get to the truth.
“Mallika was one of Suyash’s regulars. Educated, very average looking and a complete misfit for the profession They say she had fallen into bad times and hence had to resort to this. But once she had entered there was no way she could proceed to walk out. She hardly ever spoke to anyone except of course the children she taught. And every six months she demanded a raise which was without any ceremony always sanctioned,” Anjali narrated with strange simplicity.
Ramya remained quiet she tried to soak in the new found information. Most of it she already knew.
“Its only a matter of time. He will agree to my demands,” Anjali replied confidently.
Ramya nodded her head uncomfortably.
* * *
Its been six months and there has been no new development. Money I had saved back home is fast drying up and along with it my dreams. The paper and pen too has stopped attracting me. So many times I go to the station and look at the train timetable. I stare at the train that goes back home and vicariously visit my school, home, friends and whatever is left of family. It is my reset button. Then I remember my resolution of becoming somebody before returning and swiftly turn around to leave.
Its been a tough journey so far. Suyash has been of great help to me. He is forever asking me if I need something or if I require a friend to talk to. If it wasn’t for him I perhaps would have long forgotten my purpose in first place. But then how long will this continue? Who in this world will help if not for ulterior motives?
But its these kids who come home to study, they form the best time spent of the day. Its amazing to watch them read and write, building a future for themselves. Where my own distant next looks dismal, seeing them create a distinct one for themselves acts like salvation somehow.
Salvation. In times of weakness or perhaps a drive down the wrong road, what is your salvation? What makes you believe you are saved from that life beyond death punishments?
Ramya stopped reading and began to stare into nothingness. In times of weakness or perhaps a drive down the wrong road, what is your salvation? She reflected on her past few weeks, how many times she must have sinned if going by the strict laws of nature. She has lost count. But has she for once thought about its retribution? Wondered what may lay ahead in exchange of her deeds? Man is built to fear consequences of his actions but how much of those actions can be understood in the light of his own situation.
A hungry man has to survive, if he kills another to quell his thirst and need for food then is he a sinner? Ramya’s mind started to form their own contortions, and soon she found herself writing another letter.
Life has not moved forward for me too. But then living under the watchful eyes of Suyash has made me realise it may never improve. In a strange way I realise I might never fulfill my dreams as long as he is there to take care of me. My passion to reach heights should have increased knowing I have a settled present but its exactly opposite. The comfort of earning money has dismissed the idea of multiplying it.
Moving over to your question, what is my salvation? Perhaps reading your letters. In strange ways of life I feel I am giving you what you always deserved. A friend, respect and recognition. I re-read your letters, think about them day and night. Your writings are my only companion now, they bring peace to me. You are achieving your life’s purpose through these letters. And me being instrumental in this, feel I am on my way to create salvation for myself.
Ramya kept away the letters and went outside. She heard the train whistle nearby. The sound made her smile, she remembered Mallika’s words It is my reset button.
to be contd. at This is not your battle-Part 16
* * *
Connecting it with Ultimate Blogging Challenge.