When you approach thirty, you start growing an extra pair of horns and blinkers. And lots of grey hair (obviously).

My last *almost* viral post was 29 ‘Life is too short’ lessons at 29. So you can safely conclude that for someone openly dismissing age as any factor to consider while making decisions, I am a huge hypocrite.

But then who isn’t? I mean of course, except for Narendra Modi (PLEASE DON’T GET POLITICAL – THIS IS NOT TWITTER)

*shrugs* *drinks cups of tea* *reaches out for a gun* 

Well. So what changed since my last *almost* viral post? I turned thirty for one. I am one month away from turning thirty one. I started this mass movement online proclaiming ‘Thirty is the new twenty’.

Still safe to conclude I am a huge hypocrite.But wait, we also heard over this one last year how popular listicles are. And boy this blog needs popularity (and money and overnight stardom and money)

So today lets blog another ‘listicle’ (which BTW my auto-correct is time and again changing to testicles)

30 Myths busted at 30

Colgate is the only toothpaste – Isn’t

Xerox is the only way to photocopy – Isn’t

Vicco turmeric doesn’t have a marketing budget – Has, they recently launched a TV ad

PV Narsimha Rao is our PM –  Strangely this myth holds good only for me (WHATTT he held two terms and I gave a million GK tests then)

Engineer ban jao bahut scope hai – I REST MY CASE.

Doctor banna bahut mushkil hai – Bahut bahut mushkil hai.

My parents worked very hard to be where they are – WRONG. If they did I would be sitting in that IPL dugout and not Akash Ambani

25 is an ideal age to get married – Umm no, you did. It is child marriage

Want to earn so much money to never check price tags – Very boring. Checking price tags and haggling with an autowala have their OWN highs

I will be a star at work – You will be at work.

I won’t be like my parents – YOU WILL BE EXACTLY LIKE YOUR PARENTS. And especially like the one who irritates you more.

I will have lots of friends – You will have a Friend.

I won’t fight indulge in gossips like an aunty – You will probably be the reason for all those gossips 😀

I will fall in love and have a fairy-tale ending – You will fall in love, many times.

My high school boyfriend will come back in my life and we will get married – Your high school boyfriend will come back and you will have an even bitter break up.

For what it’s worth, I will travel the world – Europe at best.

I will sell my apartment and travel the world – Ha ! You first need to buy an apartment.

I will be appreciated for who I am – You will continue to live by this line but all in vain.

Time heals – Time helps cope.

I will continue to use my Yahoo id forever – But yahoo will not.

There will be a national holiday on my birthday – you will take a holiday on your birthday

I will have two babies by thirty – you will be a baby at thirty

I will start looking old and ugly by thirty – You will start doing makeup at thirty

I will read a lot of books – you will read a lot, a lot of books

I will write for someone else – You will write for yourself

I will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize – you will be asking Ang San Suu Kyi to return hers

I will stop being affected when friends ditch or betray me – You will stop showing.

I will marry a boy who is tall, dark and handsome – very intelligent and loves me to the moon and back – You will marry and not dark, may love to moon and back but definitely respects you like hell !

I will become an IAS officer – you will become an entrepreneur 🙂

Thirty is Thirty – Thirty is the New Twenty *shades on, moves like jagger*

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I am taking my Alexa Rank to the next level with My Friend Alexa. And as part of this I am blogging a series on turning thirty, this was first one ! Next seven will detail more of my insights about turning on the right side of thirty. Be there and be in comments too, would love to hear what you make of these myths ! Any you relate with ?

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