‘If weren’t a star, would be writer’

These lines flashed on my twitter timeline and got me thinking. If we weren’t what we were what would we be?

And of course I was right there focusing on the six letter word staring at me from my mobile screen. It made me guilty, scared and slightly pensive about everything I had achieved. A twenty seven six year old woman desperate to make things alright. A small life of trials and tribulations, resolving to stay quiet. And yet slight touch of that very qwerty keyboard opened the Pandora box of life. Her heart.

It was the year two oh one three when I decided to give the online world of blogs a second chance. Β I started toΒ type write.

A lot of my friends screamed and howled that my content was incomprehensible. Structures of sentence highly unpredictable. In certain cases off the rules of Wren and Martin. But to me those dancing letters seemed alright. It was me.

Incomprehensible. Unpredictable. Off the rules.

The more I wrote the more it became right. More stories flew through words of fiction. More emotions in those free writes. And today when I look back these last fifteen months I begin to question, what would I be if not a writer?

My answer is nothing.Β 

While today people have started understanding my writing, the same ideas are flowing back into my personality. I have started opening up, talking about my issues (where the deal is not too tight) and slowly falling into a pattern of lies.

Did I mention lies? Yes, writing often is nothing but weaving out truth between all those lies. Hiding behind a story, a fictional characters – our personalities sneak out.

Am I happy or sad? I wonder. But yes, sometimes that odd one line from an old post helps bring a smile. I am what I am because of what I write. And if it doesn’t sound too narcissist I am what I am also because I keep reading what I write…

I ask you a simple question today, ‘If you weren’t what you are today, what would you be?’

P.S If you are wondering who said that starting line, it was Deepika Padukone recently on a social media network. Cheesy? I guess so πŸ™‚


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